There is a stereotype, an expectation, regarding mothers:  the best mother is overworked, under-appreciated, running on empty, comes crawling on all fours because she’s so exhausted, but of course she loves her children, so who is she to say no to their wishes and demands.  A mother who seems well-rested and happy cannot possibly be doing a good job because if she were she’d come crawling on all fours da-da-da.

Sounds sarcastic, seems exaggerated, but is true.  Look around: there’s a certain glamour to being overworked.  Find a well-rested and happy mother and the rumors start:  how does she do it?  Oh.  She’s got help.  Well, if *I* had help I wouldn’t be so exhausted all the time either.  (So, why don’t you get help?)

Private piano teachers aren’t much different, except you need to add “under-paid” to the equation.  There is a certain glamour to being exhausted because you teach so much, to being under-paid (and of course struggling with parents who either don’t pay or who pay late etc.) – the starving artist still seems to have a certain appeal; to not having time “for anything!” – especially for attending performances it seems.  I do not care to remember how many times I have attended a concert or a masterclass, here in town (= no traveling required!) and I was the only teacher from our organization there.

Much of the work of a piano teacher lies outside of the actual piano lesson.  College professors who teach 18 contact hours are considered full-time.  Outside of the actual lesson/class but within the normal 40-hour week there’s preparation time, evaluation time, professional development time, etc.  College professors are expected to do and publish research, attend meetings, etc., all within the normal 40-hour week.

I once had a colleague who told me, regarding a somewhat complicated student who was looking for a different teacher, “I can’t teach him anymore. I would have to prepare the lessons, and I don’t have time for that.”

Say what??

Whenever someone asks me, “so, how many students do you have?” I have to say that I don’t count them.  How do you count the student who comes on average every other week because his work schedule is so busy?  Half a student?  I do know that on average, I teach about 22 contact hours each week but that’s only the private lessons.  On top of that are additional contact hours in the form of irregularly scheduled performance classes, extra lessons to prepare for competitions etc.

However you count it, it is too much.  Part of the problem is that there is not enough time, quality time, to do all the preparing, evaluating, watching and editing and uploading student videos, professional development, etc.  The other problem is that when I get sick – and I seem to get sick more often these days – it is a nightmare to find times to make up a day’s worth of lessons.  Or:  competitions and auditions routinely happen on weekends – I normally teach six students on Saturdays, so when I am at a competition I can’t at the same time teach lessons = need to find time to make those up as well.  I have dedicated make-up lesson days on my calendar and I offer make-up and extra lessons on no-school days but those days are filling up awfully fast.

There have been days lately where I teach from 10:15 a.m. til 7:15 p.m. (with a lunch break).  My lessons are very focused, my students usually have 100% of my attention 100% of the lesson time – I feel bad when I have to take 5 minutes from a 45-minute lesson to use the bathroom (because I teach for such long stretches at a time).  I don’t want the quality of the lessons to diminish just because I am exhausted.

A colleague of mine routinely has to cancel lessons because of illness due to working too much.

In a way, this reminds me of the no-pain-no-gain attitude.  There are fortunately fewer and fewer teachers who disregard their students’ physical (and emotional) discomfort caused by an unhealthy approach to playing the piano, and more and more teachers who pay particularly close attention to injury-free technique and an overall healthy attitude toward playing, practicing, performing, competing, etc.

So, if we are so conscious regarding our students’ well-being, why do we seem so willing to ignore our own? Why do teachers glorify the problems that stem from teaching too many hours, from accepting students who drain the teacher’s energy because they are not a good match, personality-wise?  Why do teachers accept tuition that is too low, given their education, expertise, and experience – and then complain that they don’t have enough money?   Because unless it hurts it’s no good?

All in all not a healthy situation.

I don’t want to be one of those teachers who proudly complain that they are overworked, consider themselves under-paid, who come crawling on all fours because they are so exhausted.  And who get sick because they don’t have the time to take care of themselves.

I see no glamour in that.  I only see that my teaching would suffer.

So.  I have looked at my students and at my teaching schedule, and I have started to think which of my students might do as well, or better, with a different teacher – at least temporarily, if not permanently.  The challenge is how to explain to the parents/students that this is not a weeding-out process, trying to get rid of unwanted students, but an attempt to find what is best for both the students and me.

Of course, this 40-hour work week is my personal choice – it allows time for my family which is important to me.  If someone else chooses to work 60 or more hours, that’s perfectly ok but, I think, only if it can be done without detrimental effects on their health, and, please, without taking pride in getting sick from working “so much”.

As much as I love teaching, I am so very ready for a break now.  There were days recently where I thought that the end of my eight weeks of summer teaching can’t come soon enough.  And it wasn’t that students had become worse or that teaching wasn’t as much fun as usual – I simply need a break.  ~  Mark reminds me that part of what makes the summer exhausting is that because everyone’s schedule constantly changes, no two days are the same, no two weeks are the same; there’s no routine, no predictability, part of me is constantly busy trying to keep track of the ever-changing schedule.  I’m not complaining, as a matter of fact I enjoy being able to encourage parents to take advantage of the fact that my schedule can be so much more flexible in the summer.  But it wears on me.

My vacation now for the next three and a half weeks is of course only a vacation from teaching actual lessons; I will still be busy preparing the fall schedule, catching up on reading and watching videos, among many other piano and teaching-related things.

I have recently become “friends” with a number of pianists and musicians on facebook many of whom routinely post links to very interesting videos, videos of performances (student and/or professional), teaching demonstrations, as well as music and teaching-related articles, etc.  Over the last several weeks I have accumulated a long list of links of videos to watch and articles to read “when I get to it” …

A colleague of mine who studied with Sheila Paige is lending me some of her videos which are so chock full of information that during normal teaching days I cannot digest more than one video a day.  So, I am looking forward to having more time and leisure.

Last summer I had a young Asian student who consistently played one part of his assignment particularly well:  his pieces from Beyer Op. 101 were unusually well-prepared and musical (the other pieces not so much).  When I commented on it, the mother told me that there are videos of a Chinese pianist/teacher available online who demonstrates each piece, performs it, shows how to practice, etc.  The mother made her son watch the videos and follow the instructions.  With beautiful results.  So.  I have started to record videos of my performing some of the pieces my students play, some at practice tempo with metronome, for them to watch at home in order to refresh their memory of what we started at the lesson.  Mostly this is about technique and to set a musical example of what I expect the student to aspire to.  Time-consuming, and not usually something I like to do on normal teaching days when I have only 15 minutes in between so many other things.

And then of course there are the things that have nothing to do with piano or teaching:  I look forward to spending more time gardening (I hand-weed the lawn …), smelling the roses I recently planted (yes, in the 100 degree heat of the summer but I couldn’t resist the “all bedding plants 50% off” sale), watching the immensely cute little frogs and less-cute toads that have decided to live on the deck, the patio, in the planters by the entrance …

I look forward to not having a schedule.  I look forward to doing things when I get to them, not because they’re on the calendar and need to happen at a certain time.  I look forward to breathing space.  Sitting on the deck, in the heat, feet up, dripping with sweat, smiling.

August 18 came and went and life is good again. 

I had returned from Germany late Saturday evening which gave me a wonderfully relaxed Sunday with Mark, a Monday with nothing on the calendar, a Tuesday full of interviews, so by Wednesday the 18th I had had a couple days to come home and get organized, ready to start teaching. 

While I don’t believe in jet lag = the assumption that for a couple days after transatlantic travel my body is still operating in a different time zone, I do acknowledge that spending a day that begins at 5:30 a.m. in Germany and ends some 24 hours later at 10:30 p.m. in Manhattan, KS – a day that is spent sitting and trying to sleep in a taxi, airplane seats, waiting areas and a car - takes its toll on a body that is closer to age 50 than 40.   I was dragging for a few days, taking delicious naps and generally taking it a easy.   It helped that the terrible heatwave which had gripped Manhattan the previous weeks had finally broken right before I arrived back in Kansas. 

My schedule this semester is very full, and it is still evolving:  since I started the piano semester six days before students went back to (public) school, some students were still on vacation which necessitated rescheduling their lessons.  Now that we have started and students are back in school, the reality of how realistic the piano schedule is for my students is starting to sink in.  I have already had requests to move lessons to a slightly different time to accommodate other family obligations during the school year.   Back-to-school nights temporarily mess with the schedule.  So far, I’ve been able to accommodate these requests.  

Other changes that are coming up:  I have particularly many transfer students this semester, and all transfer students start with twice-weekly 30-minute lessons until I am confident I can leave them alone with their assignment for an entire week and we switch to once-a-week 45-minute lessons.  There is no time limit on this transition: for some students it takes a few weeks, for some many months.  So there’ll be changes to my schedule throughout the semester, depending on how fast students transition.  I have future students waiting for a time slot to open so they can start lessons.  I have current students whom I am watching particularly carefully because they are not doing as well as they could and should because I may not be the best teacher for them.  If I determine that I in fact am not what they need I will approach the parents and suggest a change. 

But all in all, the semester is off to a good start and I have a pretty good idea of what my schedule will look like for the rest of the semester.  Busy.

Many a parent, when inquiring about piano lessons, asks if there is a discount for siblings.  While I understand the parents’ point of view, they apparently haven’t thought this through with the teacher in mind. 

Teaching siblings is usually more work rather than less for the teacher because I have to be careful about possible sibling rivalry.  For instance:  should we or should we not use the same book/pieces for all siblings?  In many cases it is better to NOT use the same book so as to avoid unfair comparisons because I have never had siblings who progressed at the same pace exactly.  One is usually faster than the other, if only for some time, and the resulting comparison can be very frustrating and depressing for the slower student, in particular if it is a younger sibling who happens to be the faster student - which is often the case because they have had the advantage of hearing the older sibling practice and play the pieces they then get to learn!  (They don’t have to be in the same book at the same time for these comparisons to happen.) 

As far as scheduling lessons goes:  while parents may think it would be easier to schedule their children all in a row, for the teacher it is far easier to find time for one 30- or 45-min time slot in a day than for two or more 30-or 45-min time slots in a row, especially in an already fairly full schedule.  

I once heard of a teacher who suggested that we should actually charge more for siblings …

Recently, I joined Music Teacher’s Helper.  That’s a website designed to make the business aspects of the Music Teacher’s life easier.  I’m not sure that I’ll sign up for the full service.   While the general idea and layout are very well-designed, uncluttered, there are a few things I don’t like, such as the fact that it’s a “fill in all the blanks” kind of thing:  I can’t leave any blanks – blank.  I would like to have a choice whether to fill in – or not – the composer of a student’s piece, or the student’s tuition, etc.  It won’t allow me to save the page until I have filled in all the blanks, which I find unnecessary and time-consuming.

They also have a standard format for dates, but they don’t tell you until you have filled in all the blanks and try to save the page; then they say that the way you input the date didn’t conform, so you have to go back and redo it, which to me is a waste of time which goes against their claim that their website will save me time.

As part of the package, they are sending me informative emails.  How-to’s.  And their ideas on how to deal with potential problems.  Much of it seems geared toward the new and inexperienced teacher, the teacher who has to be convinced of the importance and usefulness of a studio website, the teacher who doesn’t have a lesson cancellation policy, the teacher who struggles with parents who don’t pay, etc.

I don’t know how to say this without sounding arrogant:  I already have a professionally designed website, and many – all – of the potential problems that are listed in those emails are simply not an issue for me.

Last summer, when I told colleagues and friends that I was going to travel to students’ homes to teach, one colleague in particular warned me, “I did that for a while. It was a nightmare!  You get there, they aren’t home, you waste your time, they don’t pay …”   I have been teaching in students’ homes now since last October and have yet to arrive at a home where the student wasn’t there.  Not only are they home, they are ready and prepared to start the lesson on time.  When I taught in my studio in Manhattan, it would occasionally happen that a student didn’t show up – rarely, actually – but they always called soon after and had a satisfactory explanation.  And when, very rarely, a parent would explain, “I just completely forgot!” I would smile and remember that I, too, forget things once in a while. 

I am perhaps different from other teachers in the way I handle missed lessons:  as a mother, I understand that children don’t give you 24 hours notice that they are going to be sick the next day and won’t be able to attend their lesson, so, in my opinion, requiring 24 hour notice (- or else!) is – just not reasonable.  In my studio, the parents respectfully call as soon as they know that they can’t be there for the lesson. 

Such an attitude goes both ways:  there have been times when I called parents, students, and asked if we could reschedule the lesson.  I do get migraines, completely irregularly, unpredictably, randomly, sometimes two in a week and then nothing for two months, and the only thing that helps is to take my meds and crawl into bed and try to sleep it off.  Over the winter, I was struggling with fatigue and minor depression (what an insulting name for something that over the long run can be just as debilitating as “real” depression), and there were times when I called and asked to reschedule a lesson.  I wasn’t sick, but I was in no shape to be teaching young children.  24 hour notice?  Hardly.

I understand that things come up, short notice, and I always make an effort to reschedule the lesson.  For other teachers, such a policy might spell disaster, but I have to say that for the last ten, fifteen years, no parent in my studio has ever abused that privilege.  I know that a lot of teachers will, out of principle, not reschedule lessons that are missed because of birthday parties, etc.  I understand that it can create a lot of work for the teacher to have to reschedule these lessons.  But – attending that once-a-year birthday party is probably more important to the student than attending a weekly piano lesson, so if it can be done at all, I will reschedule the lesson.   

If you give them an inch, they won’t take it.  My piano parents occasionally call and apologize for the inconvenience and ask if a lesson can be moved.  They also understand, and accept, that if the lesson can not be moved, they are simply losing it.  There were a few lessons last year where an unusually busy student just couldn’t find the time for the lessons, nor any make-up times I suggested, but the parents kept paying the tuition, and once in a while, she was able to have a lesson.

Tuition.  Apparently, there are parents who don’t pay.  Or don’t pay on time.  Or try to argue about the amount.  I think this is a matter of communication:  I assume that when parents don’t pay, on time, it is not out of malice or because they don’t value my work, I assume it is simply because they forgot about it.  Paying the monthly tuition is not exactly the only thing they have on their plate.  So.  In Manhattan, I used to send email reminders, and a surprising number of parents thanked me for that.  Here in Olathe, Overland Park, Spring Hill, if I need to remind a parent, I get an embarrassed, “whoops!  I completely forgot!” and then they write the check right there and then.  For parents who want to argue about the amount – I make sure they understand that the monthly tuition does not necessarily reflect the number of lessons in any particular month, but that it is an average, based on the tuition for the semester.  If a parent ever were to argue with me – attempt to argue – about how much I charge, I know that that parent would have no place in my studio. 

It is my choice whom I teach.  I accept students not on merit of “talent” but based on their desire to learn and based on parental support – and that includes their willingness to accept and pay the tuition. 

Bilanz means balance sheet, Bilanz ziehen means to take stock.  Taking stock, I would have to say that life is good, teaching is good, and I think I have one of the most wonderful jobs in the world.

In March, when my accountant informed me that the IRS allows me to deduct mileage when I travel to a student’s house to teach he also admonished me for traveling to Manhattan to teach.  His argument:  if you make, say, $4,000 a year in lessons and the IRS allows you to deduct $5,000 for mileage you may want to reconsider why you are doing this. 

A $5,000 deduction for mileage, even though you earned only $4,000? The math is correct.  Currently, the IRS allows 50 cents per mile.  A roundtrip to Manhattan is 250 miles, a $125 deduction according to the IRS.  While the gasoline+toll costs are “only” about $50 (that’s in the Lexus; I don’t dare take the Jimmy because of the poor gas mileage it gets), there are other, not so obvious, expenses – maintenance comes to mind, so this seemingly generous $125 per-trip-deduction is probably quite justified. 

While at first thought the idea of having such huge deductions and the resulting lower self-employment tax bill may seem intriguing – who wouldn’t want to pay less taxes? – , at second thought, and as Beth Gigante Klingenstein points out at every workshop, it’s not in your best interest to lower your self-employment income this way.  Taking the above calculation, earning $4,000 but having a $5,000 deduction (for travel alone, there’s more in addition to that) means that I spent $1,000 for the privilege to teach – or, if you want to look at it differently, that I lost $1,000.  Negative income. 

Of course not all of my earned income went directly toward travelling expenses, so it’s not really negative income, but let’s look at what those taxes are.

Self-employment tax is the Social Security (and Medicare) taxes.  Which means that by lowering my income through deductions (which results in a lower tax bill), as far as my retirement is concerned, even though I worked and earned money, I had practically no income this year which means that no money went toward my retirement.  As far as the Social Security Administration is concerned, I didn’t work this year.

Sobering.

Of course, one solution would be to not take that mileage/travelling deduction.  But the fact is that I do have expenses from travelling.  I do want to teach my students in Manhattan, but the expenses, all expenses – gas, deductions if I take them, time – do add up.